Marriage Issues as I See Them…
By Michaella Faith Wright
Author
In a world where cultural expectations, family traditions, and social media timelines set the pace, the pressure to marry can feel relentless. From perfectly staged engagement photos flooding your feed to relatives hinting at “your turn,” the push to tie the knot is everywhere. But marriage is far more than a dress, a ring, or a party—it’s a lifelong journey that demands maturity, emotional readiness, and financial stability.
For many women, the questions start early. It often begins with an innocent, “When are you getting married?” and slowly shifts into, “You’re not getting any younger.” While it may come from a place of love or concern, the effect can be suffocating. Society has a way of making marriage seem like a mandatory checkpoint in life, as if your worth is measured by whether you have a ring on your finger.
Yet the last five years have shown a sobering reality—divorce rates are climbing, and many breakups share a common cause: pressure. Family pressure. Friend pressure. The pressure to match the pace of those around you. Too often, people enter marriage simply because they feel it’s “time,” not because they are truly ready. And once inside, the cracks appear quickly. Arguments flare faster, finances become a battleground, and emotional gaps grow wider.
The truth is, marriage isn’t the beginning of life—it’s a chapter in it. Before you walk down the aisle, you need to know who you are, what you want, and where you’re going. Empowerment isn’t about perfection; it’s about knowing your value, having your own voice, and being able to stand on your own two feet. It means becoming emotionally whole before committing to share your life with someone else. When you understand yourself—your strengths, weaknesses, values, and dreams—you’re in a better position to choose a partner who complements you rather than completes you.
Financial readiness is also a form of empowerment. Love may be powerful, but love alone cannot pay the bills. Money-related stress remains one of the top reasons for marital breakdown, and couples who don’t have honest conversations about finances before marriage often face challenges later. Being financially stable doesn’t mean being wealthy—it means being aware of your income, expenses, savings, and the lifestyle you can realistically sustain. It also means being able to weather life’s storms without the constant fear of financial ruin.
Unfortunately, many people skip this stage entirely because they’re too focused on meeting social expectations. Families, with the best intentions, can sometimes push too hard. A mother’s gentle nudge, an aunt’s constant reminders, or a father’s concern about “time passing” can tip into emotional pressure. Friends can add their own influence, especially when everyone in the group seems to be settling down. Social media only magnifies this, turning weddings into competitive spectacles and making it harder for people to stick to their own timelines.
But no one urging you to hurry will have to live with the daily reality of your choice—only you will. And the rise in divorce tells a clear story. Many people look back and admit they ignored their own doubts because they didn’t want to disappoint others or feared being left behind. Others confess they were swayed by the excitement of a big wedding without fully considering the lifetime commitment it represented.
The emotional cost of marrying before you are ready is high. Instead of building a life together from a place of strength, couples find themselves struggling to patch emotional holes while also dealing with the day-to-day demands of marriage. Communication suffers, intimacy declines, and resentment can take root. Over time, the relationship may become more about survival than joy.
Breaking free from societal pressure takes courage. It means looking at your life honestly and setting your own pace, even when others don’t understand. It means growing in your career, learning how to handle life’s challenges, and surrounding yourself with people who respect your decisions. It means having the confidence to say, “I will marry when I am ready, not when you think I should.”
One of the most damaging myths is that marriage will fix loneliness, unhappiness, or personal struggles. In truth, marriage magnifies whatever is already there. If you are unhappy alone, chances are you will be unhappier in a relationship that isn’t right. A partner can support you, but they cannot heal wounds you haven’t addressed yourself. Entering marriage with unresolved issues is like building a house on unstable ground—it may look fine at first, but over time the cracks will show.
When two whole, healthy individuals choose each other freely, marriage can be beautiful. It can be a partnership rooted in respect, trust, and shared purpose. It can be a space where both people grow together rather than lose themselves in the process. But when marriage is built on fear, deadlines, or the need to please others, it becomes a fragile structure, easily cracked by the pressures of life.
We need to change the conversation about marriage. It’s not a race, and it’s not the ultimate proof of success. A single person living a fulfilled, purposeful life is not “incomplete.” They are simply walking a different path. And choosing to marry when your heart, mind, and circumstances are truly aligned is one of the greatest acts of self-respect you can give yourself.
So the next time someone leans in with that inevitable question— “When are you getting married?”—smile and remember that your answer belongs to you alone. The right time is when you feel ready, not when society says you should be.
Because a wedding lasts a day, but a marriage lasts a lifetime. And that lifetime should be lived on your terms—without regret, without compromise, and without the weight of someone else’s expectations hanging over your happiness.
Copyright –Published in Expo Magazine, September-October 2025 Edition Vol.3, No.6, (ExpoTimes News – Expo Media Group (expomediasl.com)
